Lazy Friday

Ahoy there folks. I've been trapped in a dungeon the last couple of days writing essays, and I'm glad to temporarily be out. I also just picked up an iPhone, and while I still like the Android OS more...I can tell I'll be content with getting iPhones for a loooooong time. Their processing power seems to be a little bit more consistent, and to be honest, thats all I really care about. Anyways, I fell asleep in the school library last night and wasted a bunch of my day today sleeping, so here what is quite possibly Russell Peters only good bit. Dude is spot on with impressions and accents!

Have a good weekend!

Rhinos...

...are not one to fuck wit'



Here is something even more strange. This twitter feed that is all "Sayings for Girls", where "She" (there has to be a few of them), are pumping out like 5-10 of these sayings an hour. Its quite....ridiculous I guess.

Also, yes Bart, West Edmonton Mall does have a shooting range. But there are a bunch of them; I think theres 3 or 4 here in Calgary too. When I was younger, we went to one and got to shoot .44 Mags, M-16's, whatever. It was too good.

Is it seriously only Tuesday?

I woke up this morning, feeling so good, thinkin it was Friday. Apparently its going to be a long week, but oh well. I have a couple of papers to finish up before the end of the month, so I figured it was going to be pretty busy.

Anywho, here are a few funny things I've found. First off, we got something as crazy as it sounds, and that is Volcano Surfing.


While they Volcano isn't active...these people are still zoomin down! 40 km per hour doesn't seem too fast when you're in a car or on a motorcycle, but when you're just on a sled its extreme.


Then there was also this article I found, with the worst tip you've ever seen at a restaurant. As a bartender, I would kill this dude.



And before I go, my friend's label, Tycho Records, has released a free compilation on soundcloud. Enjoy!
Free Bass'n Vol.1 by Tycho Records

I can't believe I forgot to post this...

I am a sucker for those really bad church signs and billboards; I think they're some of the funneist things on the internet. And the other night, when I was out in downtown, I found a sign of my own. I was going to write a description, but instead, I will just ask this; This has to be intentional, right? No one is this daft, right?????

#Occupy Pepper Spray Cop

You've probably seen him everywhere lately (and if not, again, what are you doing on the internet!?), but here is an article with a bunch of hilarious photoshops, now that its become a full fledged meme.

http://www.uproxx.com/webculture/2011/11/meme-watch-pepper-spray-cop-will-casually-pepper-spray-everyone-and-everything

Here is my favorite of the batch, let me know which one is yours!

Juggalos: The New Threat!

I'm going to assume most of you know what a Juggalo is by this point in time, but in a nutshell; they are fans of the Insane Clown Posse (if you by chance don't know who they are...here is an example. If you haven't heard that before, what are you doing on the internet?), dress in facepaint, drink terrible soda, and feel like they are misunderstood.

I have to agree that they are misunderstood, because the FBI just released their annual Gang report, and have listed Juggalos on there (pg 21). This is pretty ridiculous, as they are the grown up equivalents of that fat kid in elementary that got picked on. Yes, I'm sure some commit crime. Yes, they hang out in groups and identify with one another. But is this enough to make them a gang? Are they even that organized? I fucking doubt it. And to be honest, having them above the section for Human trafficing and prostitution is pretty ridiculous...

I dunno about this one guys; what are your thoughts?

I didn't know it was possible to love Pokemon this much....

But apparently it is...yikes!

The Greatest Overreaction on YouTube Since Double Rainbow -- powered by Cracked.com

Who IS The Greatest Gangster of All Time?

I never really ponder this question, but I've just seen a picture that has peaked my interest, and made me think about it. Who would it be? You could go as far back as 2000 years ago and say it was the Roman Emperors/Roman Catholic Church, since they've been on some mafia style shit since then. You could bring it to contemporary times, and say it was Al Capone, Lucky Luciano, Carlo Gambino, John Gotti, or any other Italian living in the Eastern Seaboard; they are pinnacles of the American Mafia. They don't cut it, though.

The Greatest Gangster of all time, is someone that we all know of, but wouldn't expect to be so. He was very soft spoken, and had a best friend named bubbles.


























Thats right, Michael Jackson was a goddamned Crip (and this was after he turned white. Thats how you know he was legit), so therefore, he is the Greatest Gangster of all time.

In hindsight, Beat It probably should have given this away...

Back on the Trolley

Well its been a little while since I've done a legitimate post, and here is why. Its been a long week, working on papers, group projects, and studying for midterms (sadly, I've only had one midterm so far...four more to go...), as well as finding out my wisdom teeth are quite impacted, and super inflamed. Bleh.

However, there is good news. With my work and school coverage, it will pretty much be 100% covered, and thats always nice. I've also had a bunch of people look at my papers (it'd been a while since I wrote a proper essay), and they said there wasn't a whole lot of fault in there; just minor rust. Its also (Canadian) Thanksgiving, so me and the lady are going away for a few days. Its nowhere special, but they have one of the top paleontology museums in the country. And we're nerds, so it works. Plus the hotel has a hot tub, so fuck yeah.

And since I can't leave you without something to remember, here are Cam'Rons Most Ignorant Moments. If you don't know who Cam'ron is, he is a rapper from Harlem, who as you will see, has done and said some pretty hilarious things. You may recognize him from this meme (which is from moment #4):



Some more examples of these ignorant moments: showing off the stripclub in his house, bringing a girl into Walgreens and seeing what she can hold in her butt cheeks, making his mom scrub his jewelry with a toothbrush...its pretty funny.


Happy Thanksgiving, folks!

While I Don't Condone the Use of Drugs

I do condone watching this video. This video is from the early 1990's, at some Rave in the UK. You wanna see people messed up dancing hilariously? We got you covered.

Come on F**kin Guy...

Now yes, I realize this video is as old as the internet itself now, but I remember this video when it was fresh. Like 1000 views fresh. Being in Canada and involved in hip hop in High School had some perks. I guess seeing this before most people was one of them. For those who haven't ever seen this before, it is probably the most hilarious rap video of all time. I don't recommend watching it if you're at work (and school might not be the best of ideas either, but meh), as there are (somewhat) scantily clad women in it. Enjoy, my friends (and enjoy the hilarity of his facebook page)

I'd say this is the best thing to happen to hip hop since Big Bear's "Doin Thangs" album cover...

The People Clap Loud When You Win a Grammy...

...Louder when you win an Oscar...but the people clap the loudest when you fall...

Watch the whole thing. Just do it. Does anyone know what show this is from?

And This Guy Was Probably Thinking...

"Man, you dutch people have some weird sinks..."

Your Midweek News (as found by me)

Glad to see the excellent response for yesterdays post! AK1200 is a personal favorite of mine, and I was glad to share what he's got. Here's a nice old skool track for y'all.


Unfortunately, he can't even play "Drowning" out live anymore, due to it being on his old label and blah blah blah. I actually saw him live twice in one week, a few years back, and the first show (which I think was a Wednesday)was the last show where he was legally allowed to play it. However, he might be able to gain the rights back in 35 years, as starting in 2013, any artist can now try to regain their song rights, if they apply two years in advance. The RIAA is not impressed, obviously.


And on a PSA tip,apparently, non-stick pans are apparently not healthy for us. If this is true, should we really be surprised? I mean, we all knew it was a chemical coating, right?


This video may be the sappiest video I ever post on here. It is an engagement video. However, if you can wait until the end, its totally worth it. I promise.



And on the other end of the relationship spectrum...Mayor dumps gift-wrapped 20-tonne boulder on ex-wife’s lawn. A quote, from the Mayor of Saint-Théodore-d’Acton, Quebec " I had to do something so she’d leave me alone. That’s the biggest rock she’ll ever get in her life." He also owns an excavation company, so I'm sure the town appreciates that wasn't at their expense.


For all the Tech heads, Nintendo is creating a "Massively Single Player game". This is for "Those who want to play games that are more dynamic, not-based on Al and not-pre-scripted like multiplayer games, however, don't want to 'deal' with other people, appreciate the privacy it provides." What are your thoughts on this concept? Do you think it will work?


Life magazine has assembled a bunch of pictures of the Berlin Wall for us, from its erection to its fall, and wrapped it all up in a nice slideshow.


For our last story, we go to Texas, where a 19 year old "vampire" broke into a womans house because "he needed to feed". Oh, and he's also been alive for 500 years. My favorite quote comes from an officer, Daniel Erickson: "He was begging us to restrain him because he didn't want to kill us". Had this kid been black or mexican, that quote would have been enough for them to get lit up.

How Does One Take Himself Seriously

When he makes a video like this?



Dude looks like a mix between Dennis Leary and Michael Douglas, and raps about the same as they would too. In a way, its kind of cool to see a guy this old rapping, as it shows how mainstream the music has really become, and the social barriers its broken...but goddamn it, some people really need to know when to just stick to being a fan!


But hey, at least he isn't as bad as Lawyer Mike.



Or as bad as...McRorie...


Have a good weekend, everybody!